tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53544688149049266252024-02-21T06:38:30.822+00:00Pontecarlo or BustEmotional Fuckwit, sharing the inner most workings of her mid life crisis.Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.comBlogger281125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-37780511613608648132015-03-02T22:35:00.001+00:002015-03-02T22:37:25.649+00:00It's ok to cryThis might be an uncomfortable read. It's been difficult to start and I expect will be difficult to write. <div><br></div><div>I've written it several times in my head (& sometimes it said exactly what I was hoping to) and now I'm finally committing words to the page. People who know me IRL know that after 4 miscarriages I finally accepted that I wouldn't be a mother. The only choice was that I couldn't bare to lose another baby. </div><div><br></div><div>Last Monday I was visiting another office and one of my colleagues went home unwell. I didn't know the details but it was pretty easy to figure out she was pregnant and something wasn't right. </div><div><br></div><div>I saw the colleague I'd been visiting that day on Thursday and asked after her and was told she wasn't great and wasn't in. I asked if she'd miscarried and it was confirmed she had. Poor poor lady. </div><div><br></div><div>She doesn't know I know, not many people knew she was pregnant. I want to giver her a big hug and tell her it's ok to grieve, no matter how early it was it's still a loss. </div><div><br></div><div>I want to tell her that people will say insensitive stupid things - oh well lucky it was so early, it happens to everyone you know, don't worry you're young you can try again, at least you hadn't got too used to the idea. They mean well - honest they do. They don't really know what to say. </div><div><br></div><div>We all deal with these things in different ways. Maybe they would be fine - maybe you are. But if you're not then I wish I could say to you how sorry I am for your loss. How it's ok to grieve for the what might have been. It's ok to be sad about the little hand you don't get to hold. It's ok to be upset about not sharing your life. It's ok to cry. </div><div><br></div><div>And to your partner. I know people forget about them. But I expect he imagined the future and will be feeling the loss and pain. Hold him. Keep him close. Don't let this become a thing between you. </div><div><br></div><div>At 6 weeks, 9 weeks or 12 it's still fecking horrible. So take time to grieve, if you need it. Deal with things in your own way. And for those with the careless words smile and breath. </div><div><br></div><div>Be kind to yourself and if you need to have a good cry. </div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-4818945017411394192015-02-21T10:41:00.000+00:002015-02-21T10:41:21.107+00:00Friday FrolicsAn arrangement made last minute after a call requesting I keep a friend company whilst her husband took her mother to the opera turned into a fabulous friday night. <br />
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I am little bleary eyed this morning but it was worth it.<br />
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I've been working from home the back end of this week so other than a trip out to meet a friend Thursday hadn't really got dressed up. This friend is a glamour puss and I knew would look fabulous so I took some time to get a little glam myself.<br />
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There was the inevitable shoe dilemma (I went with the green in the end)</div>
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I met her outside the Coliseum and we decided to go an try the bars at the Savoy - neither of us had been before but I'd read good things and we fancied a grown up, easy evening.<br />
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When we arrived we were greeted and asked where the American bar was - and then asked about the Beaufort bar. A little discussion about the different vibes in each bar and the decision was made - first stop the American Bar - just off the main lobby up the stairs to the left of the entrance.<br />
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We were greeted and asked for a name to arrange a table, we were advised there would be a 20 minute wait but there was a small lobby bar we could get a drink and wait it. Bar number 1 and glass of fizz number 1. After about 10 minutes we were escorted to a table in the bar. The bar is low key, relaxed and buzzy but not bustling. We had a table with a plush banquette and a equally lux bucket seat. Whoops more champagne as we listened to the piano jazz and our applause was appreciated. The room is quite well lit (not harsh but light enough that you can actually see each other fully) and we caught up. After a while we settled the bill and headed to the Beaufort Bar.<br />
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The Beaufort Bar is situated just off the tea room further back through the hotel. It's beautiful and opulent in gold and black. Again we were seated at a table and had fabulous service. We decided to have a cocktail (pear and liquorish bellini for CP, old fashioned with makers mark for me). The vibe in the Beaufort Bar is a little different, the lighting is lower (though still not dark) and the piano player moves away from the standards and instead plays jazzy, piano versions of more modern songs (Happy anyone?). After the cocktails we went back to Fizz. It really is a beautiful bar, pricey but grown up and such a lovely place to be in London on a Friday night. (as an aside JK Rowling was in the bar too - she looked amazing!).<br />
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After a few hours of chatting and catching up it was time to meet up with the others so we left the sanctuary of the Savoy and headed to J Sheekey's for a late supper. J Sheekey's is a bit of an institution and I know that it can be a bit hit and miss but this time it was a hit hit hit. I like fish but I'm more of a meat gal and even though it's not on their menu they really do the most fabulous steak<br />
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Not the best picture quality but just trust me on this - it was fabulous. We drank some british fizz to start (wish I knew the name) and then moved on to Malbec (this mixing of drinks may be the cause of the fuzziness).<br />
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CP's Ma was full of joy after seeing La Traviata and I am hoping to go next month - she sparkled with pleasure when she talked about how the music was still dancing around inside her head (but also something about how she really could be one of the waitresses - I have to see it now if only to understand what she's talking about).<br />
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I headed home with my doggy bag (the bone on that steak wasn't going to waste!) the Piccadilly line back to North London and fell into bed at midnight full of happy and loving London. Don't you just love it when those unplanned nights turn out to be some of the best?<br />
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<br />Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-82667067673708375632015-02-17T10:12:00.001+00:002015-02-17T10:13:13.724+00:00Trying to close a chapterSo I have been separated for more than 4 years and we are finally getting round to sorting out the house which will hopefully mean that I can stop paying the mortgage on a house I don't live in.<br />
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The finances are anger inducing and I am a mug for letting it go on for this long but what has really got my goat this morning is that it's now over a year since we agreed to either sell the house or he would buy me out. In the summer he said he would like to buy me out. He finally got a mortgage offer at the end of November (which was £20k less than the estate agents had valued the house at in March the same year) and it looked like we were on our way.<br />
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But no, here we are 17th of February and I have found out that the mortgage resettlement statement he told me his solicitors requested was never requested. It has been now but as I am not living at the house the figure will go to him.<br />
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I just want it settled, want to close the chapter move on with my life and stop paying for a freaking house I don't freaking live in.<br />
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Enough already.Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-71982477114166052312015-02-15T15:01:00.001+00:002015-02-15T15:01:37.403+00:00Just another SundayI was looking for something - something I'd written a while ago. Something I'd enjoyed and shared and then, well filed away. In the memory ban that is the internet.....<br />
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It was lovely when I found it again and it brought back great memories of a weekend away. It led me to have a look through this neglected blog. You see things have moved on again, It's two jobs later and a house move and much else has stayed the same.<br />
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I'm still a hot mess but I'm doing ok with that, I know who I am (black dog and all) and it's ok.<br />
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This weekend has been one of sorting and sitting. After a few weekends of working to get a bid in on time this weekend I have had the chance to stop and get some things done. Not important work, nothing that will change the world or even make it much better but things. Things on my list, things that needed to get out of the way. So my office has been sorted, two bags sent to the charity shop and I have rested, relaxed and restored.<br />
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It's now getting late on Sunday afternoon and I am starting to think about the week ahead. The list in my head of what I'd like to achieve, the stuff I've been putting off (MUST must must do those bloomin expenses), the work that would mean success and progress.<br />
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So a new page in my note book, a new start to a new list and a whole pile of opportunity just waiting for me to take it.<br />
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Onwards.Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-49109495719622674432013-10-17T11:57:00.001+01:002013-10-17T11:57:36.375+01:00Empty spacesIts my best friends 40th birthday today. A day for celebration and joy. She's a brilliant, talented, funny, clever, warm hearted amazing woman who I have know for more than 25 years and count myself very very fortunate to have her in my life. but you see that's the thing. She's in Singapore. Hours and miles away. She's in my heart and thoughts all the time but the space next to me when we are on adventures is empty - we catch up via social media and even manage to speak on the phone or skype every now and then.<br />
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I miss her so very very much that I *may* have even had a little cry at my desk today. Selfish and silly but well its how I feel.<br />
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So I'm going to work on celebrating her today -<br />
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Happy Birthday CP - you bloody brilliant, crazy, Awesome woman you - LOVE YOU; see you next year xxxxxxx<br />
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<br />Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-1455150929553391402013-10-14T14:25:00.001+01:002013-10-14T14:25:17.468+01:00Making SpaceI'm a terrible hoarder - I have so much stuff. I don't need it all and it's sometimes suffocating. So it's time to make some space - not for new stuff but for me to breath.<br />
<br />
I moved in here just over a year ago and thats was when I got my storage locker, I have a house full to bursting with stuff I don't use or touch and a locker doing the same. Its a waste of space and time and makes me feel tense.<br />
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I'm not talking about the fabric and baskets I have for my sewing and crafting things - no its more about pieces of paper, things I might need 'one day' - no idea when this one day might be. I mean if I haven't needed it for a year will I really need it in the next?<br />
<br />
So it's time to make space. I'm starting by moving my king size spare bed into storage (not the mattress that's going to the tip - rubbish back aching temporary cheap at the time buy!) and being replaced by a day bed and trundle. It will get back a lot of floor space but also won't have this big flat surface to dump stuff on - something I'm particularly adept at.<br />
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I'm also going to empty the magic basket of toiletries and makeup - i use limited products and usually the same few the rest as just sat there gathering dust. I don't need them, use them or if I'm honest want them. Time to get out the black sacks and make space.<br />
<br />
I think what has brought this on has been my working at home the last few weeks on and off. I have a good work space - an old pine kitchen table that I share with my sewing machine, overlocker and a few bits. Plenty of room to spread out and work but the rest of the room is surrounded by stuff.<br />
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I need to make a deal with myself - not to replace the stuff with more stuff - to remember the feeling now when I am full to bursting and the need for room to think and breath.<br />
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Making space not just physically but mentally by letting stuff go.<br />
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Breath.<br />
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<br />Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-56066735698203191462013-09-10T07:46:00.001+01:002013-09-10T07:46:24.326+01:00Hello Autumn my old friend.There are those clinging on to summer this morning. Floaty skirts and open toes; refusing to accept its over. <div><br></div><div>And then there's me 40 denier & knits happy to welcome autumn with a smile and a knowing nod - ah yes hello my time. </div><div><br></div><div>Hello knits and boots and warm textures and forgiving hip skimming dresses. </div><div><br></div><div>Hello bright cool sunshine, warm refreshing rain. Hello my time. </div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-86679942784985100812013-08-16T07:08:00.001+01:002013-08-16T07:08:19.555+01:00A hot messI'm so tired. Having spent about 15 months in a role with minimal pressure and low morale I've moved to a role where I am taxed, busy and a bit frightened. My boss says she tinkers on the edge of irritability at all times and that works for her - right now I'm on the edge of fear. <div><br></div><div>Fear of being good enough, fear of meeting expectations, fear of hitting/missing deadlines, fear of being discovered as a fraud. </div><div><br></div><div>It's brilliant to be busy and to be in a role that's challenging me daily but boy I'm exhausted by it. Both mentally and physically. It's turned me. But upside down. </div><div><br></div><div>I'm also having a bit of a wardrobe nightmare - weight has crept up again, nothing fits, everything I put on just looks a bit of a mess. The outside is reflecting the inside. </div><div><br></div><div>So I'll get through today. Get some good 'stuff' done then need to use this weekend to get organised. </div><div><br></div><div>Boy! To make myself feel better here I am last weekend not looking awful at the wedding of some lovely friends:</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP3AkyQG7KjVsg-F3VZVbCvyJhUDWQdK45oT_9725vH6f5r49zfICv7NZxVYeB9TwyCrkg9KlGClLPawqAfyLFsYnURTpmQ2UVr0BKqrLzUakX8V2QsBZg4k1Cx4X85hKoEBDugaTzDbw/s640/blogger-image--1932871831.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP3AkyQG7KjVsg-F3VZVbCvyJhUDWQdK45oT_9725vH6f5r49zfICv7NZxVYeB9TwyCrkg9KlGClLPawqAfyLFsYnURTpmQ2UVr0BKqrLzUakX8V2QsBZg4k1Cx4X85hKoEBDugaTzDbw/s640/blogger-image--1932871831.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>Going to try and channel her and ignore the messy hair, too much cleavage, slightly too tight hot mess I am today!</div><div><br></div><div><br></div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-71247734139167059752013-07-23T09:59:00.002+01:002013-07-23T10:00:01.910+01:00Becoming no one (aka Real Men Don't Look Back)Its time for me to move contracts again so I am working out my last few days in my current role, preparing my handover and ensuring that my files, projects and records are up to date.<br />
<br />
The interesting thing is the shift in my colleagues behaviour and attitude towards me; each day I am moving to the outer edge of the inner circle and becoming less of a someone and much more of a no one.<br />
<br />
I get it, working a notice period is hard on everyone. You are not going to be here to deliver the longer term plans or work through the challenges that people perceive - you have jumped ship, taken the kings gold. Whether you are leaving with a tear in your eye or if you are blowing it up and not looking back (real men don't look back at explosions remember) you were in post for a reason, and I assume did good work whilst you were there but a long notice and particularly those last few days can make for awkward times.<br />
<br />
So the days are going slowly; the emails and calls are less frequent; the meetings not always relevant and the in tray looking mightily slim.<br />
<br />
So what to do? Well the best darn handover in the world obviously but otherwise its a case of smile, help where you can, give good counsel and support to your colleagues and leave the place in a way you would want to find it.<br />
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Moving on to becoming no one is a challenge but its nothing personal I guess just the way of the world. <br />
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Whilst there will be no explosion I can walk away without looking back, onwards to the next adventure.<br />
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Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-40526978439558275002013-07-17T06:40:00.001+01:002013-07-17T06:40:13.362+01:00Movie night at Bea's of BloomsburyI'm having a bit of a love affair with London this week. My brothers are in the US so they offered me their flat for the time they're away. It's perfect timing, its just worked out that I had the option to be out & about every night having a (say it quickly) social life!<div><br></div><div>This is the view from the balcony in the boys bedroom - no doubting where you are!</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0G6BO5DIxDEiHCLOU0M-DQSc_K-KgFUl49Vovnxza4vdwQjuVxd7gMlLM6CR7ZVwroJ9qdvN090AuijBVARN3NlZE3g4w2hKOldRqTrcytXjN_3eiKnGZO0_7y78lIrtTYCxlBD4r-dM/s640/blogger-image--28760102.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0G6BO5DIxDEiHCLOU0M-DQSc_K-KgFUl49Vovnxza4vdwQjuVxd7gMlLM6CR7ZVwroJ9qdvN090AuijBVARN3NlZE3g4w2hKOldRqTrcytXjN_3eiKnGZO0_7y78lIrtTYCxlBD4r-dM/s640/blogger-image--28760102.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>London has been hot hot hot this week so when LBB and I were deciding what to do last night Bea's of Bloomsbury's block party style cinema club seemed like a perfect idea. </div><div><br></div><div>Bea's is an awesome cafe with a few shops in London (including a brand new one in Farringdon that I'm planning to try this morning) and a railway arch in Maltby Street SE1 - their fresh food and cakes everyday are fantastic look at their website for more details (www.beasofbloomsbury.com).</div><div><br></div><div>We were running a little late so jumped in a cab - when we asked him to drop us off at these railway arches in what looks like an industrial area he thought we were mad, but go in through the metal door and inside it's all set up with a massive screen and a load of assorted deck chairs. </div><div><br></div><div>The screen really is massive but we still grabbed a seat at the front to stretch out </div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXd5DL2u3OZ27xukFBm2bOcZSbCmo6Y53rL8JJjz6pgUqzuUsVuDwHM7CWM0dLK9-EFYavBJCUM2zjbeniROzZmFiGPNW5zAA-VqmIL2hD6CPdEy0oRdg5rvAaUE4LlmWWrSI7730PiLs/s640/blogger-image-499851539.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXd5DL2u3OZ27xukFBm2bOcZSbCmo6Y53rL8JJjz6pgUqzuUsVuDwHM7CWM0dLK9-EFYavBJCUM2zjbeniROzZmFiGPNW5zAA-VqmIL2hD6CPdEy0oRdg5rvAaUE4LlmWWrSI7730PiLs/s640/blogger-image-499851539.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>Not unsurprisingly the food was fabulous and we went for a chilli cheese dog each and paired this with a bottle of prosecco!</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfCZdvYQ819xIzqZXKNY7jZEjzM-ZIzds12T3RsTdzdvXAaTuRdxwh2TJ1RTly_8HTl5SN10joOpMt9NwxEvb-SauGC8d2rlCHCwep3b3QfV2yxfjaIoQb01khPFXc0hKIIpXWHH8NYz0/s640/blogger-image-1852456997.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfCZdvYQ819xIzqZXKNY7jZEjzM-ZIzds12T3RsTdzdvXAaTuRdxwh2TJ1RTly_8HTl5SN10joOpMt9NwxEvb-SauGC8d2rlCHCwep3b3QfV2yxfjaIoQb01khPFXc0hKIIpXWHH8NYz0/s640/blogger-image-1852456997.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">There was also mac'n'cheese, popcorn, some delicious looking cakes, beer wine and soft drinks. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">The atmosphere was relaxed and friendly, we watched Forrest Gump and the small group laughed, sighed and cried through a few gentle hours. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">It was a great evening, we walked back in the warm evening to London Bridge which was still buzzing. I love that London offers so many choices and that awesome companies and places like Bea's exist. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">They have movie night running through the rest of July and August each Tuesday with more classic films including Some Like it Hot, Home Alone and Jaws. Tickets are £5. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">It's another beautiful London morning, I need to get up and walk to work before it gets too hot! Another adventure in town tonight. Lucky lucky me. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilzmBCV3yu0qTHKFMNQiK5-6CO9fqNixHhXZZ2uR5kmkotDYoM1IbLEaT6vSc_zAF4ntw3W4VApxkE1GmPOCfh0MPi5hZUSy1UAqHV2ywjytjdbLBoGTMT9QY9ixTtkHHxpWDU4UHH9Cg/s640/blogger-image-531479641.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilzmBCV3yu0qTHKFMNQiK5-6CO9fqNixHhXZZ2uR5kmkotDYoM1IbLEaT6vSc_zAF4ntw3W4VApxkE1GmPOCfh0MPi5hZUSy1UAqHV2ywjytjdbLBoGTMT9QY9ixTtkHHxpWDU4UHH9Cg/s640/blogger-image-531479641.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><br></div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-42082320766750868512013-07-07T19:36:00.001+01:002013-07-07T19:36:33.838+01:00July so farThe sun is shining, it's a beautiful day. <div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCRnEHwEiw9ktc8rbW2NEQzP8WaUkhzI3aTVOlzvOtQsuFw297nMhrA7W9vKWjWzlXZXsk5Y0DaqA6BYZJ3UHcGlDasW0xqdAaVru_d8ToVxeXpdI_nV9LMvJ_d0Ae6ze7RxLl4rXRiFE/s640/blogger-image-425624939.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCRnEHwEiw9ktc8rbW2NEQzP8WaUkhzI3aTVOlzvOtQsuFw297nMhrA7W9vKWjWzlXZXsk5Y0DaqA6BYZJ3UHcGlDasW0xqdAaVru_d8ToVxeXpdI_nV9LMvJ_d0Ae6ze7RxLl4rXRiFE/s640/blogger-image-425624939.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>Murray has just won the Wimbledon final and I've had a lovely few days just mooching with Goose. </div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnIxPg82V-MIivT3Sxgkmey5YL463aSiYwdEo5XQGXjiyVPXbeiptBW2g-Tw1rSBiOZ5BL4uznHtvayBt5-E6-YyK6NpkZII1mPZ0rYwF6UO6n_E6gHjml_jsQShj6ybSJO0TwIMJzG6I/s640/blogger-image-1866521235.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnIxPg82V-MIivT3Sxgkmey5YL463aSiYwdEo5XQGXjiyVPXbeiptBW2g-Tw1rSBiOZ5BL4uznHtvayBt5-E6-YyK6NpkZII1mPZ0rYwF6UO6n_E6gHjml_jsQShj6ybSJO0TwIMJzG6I/s640/blogger-image-1866521235.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>We went to Truck Stop in Canary Wharf on Friday after a long day in London. </div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA4hlhP1ksKRSZ1PXw0Grv0af3T8B76MS6yvpLDnHAdSkSr0nvIuVz_0sZoRDbXKU5cswxhBDTNGlqwUzAryoxD_loTyeeW4jz5aTfjVmhQIhkmH6peZD-GRUeoLMIyVTNzLEqFvkGJEc/s640/blogger-image-701145476.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA4hlhP1ksKRSZ1PXw0Grv0af3T8B76MS6yvpLDnHAdSkSr0nvIuVz_0sZoRDbXKU5cswxhBDTNGlqwUzAryoxD_loTyeeW4jz5aTfjVmhQIhkmH6peZD-GRUeoLMIyVTNzLEqFvkGJEc/s640/blogger-image-701145476.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>We found shade in St James Park</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6_rMb5AdcTXu9DQz85rx7Xi8D59bcrvsAi08a93UxZacRcfRH2kxTjyJaDo5iltafkqCsuOakAbHH-uUSwozhGfhUihDjZe5CLzBXgYlQX5xxUwDcLK6oyDzISOrjieVlxmns5FM34EA/s640/blogger-image--676615187.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6_rMb5AdcTXu9DQz85rx7Xi8D59bcrvsAi08a93UxZacRcfRH2kxTjyJaDo5iltafkqCsuOakAbHH-uUSwozhGfhUihDjZe5CLzBXgYlQX5xxUwDcLK6oyDzISOrjieVlxmns5FM34EA/s640/blogger-image--676615187.jpg"></a></div>And had ice cream on the south bank</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPHlvRycVP32kgJdBvjv4gfIehvulRiZhAEkKFsG5Da-_P__wn5p7gDZfOCluDjp_OXrd5VVHgvtUa0Fqe0OezRP0eX_2O3OwiRtELxy26C-f2fkML32xcgcSV74T7orE9Ah4diFPI3Os/s640/blogger-image--839084245.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPHlvRycVP32kgJdBvjv4gfIehvulRiZhAEkKFsG5Da-_P__wn5p7gDZfOCluDjp_OXrd5VVHgvtUa0Fqe0OezRP0eX_2O3OwiRtELxy26C-f2fkML32xcgcSV74T7orE9Ah4diFPI3Os/s640/blogger-image--839084245.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>Pub lunch with S&J</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCW0J-JSmAnffVLdyWxl-xmj7hyphenhyphenTWUHwZricQxqguhQMw3X5xXmpOQVHPt_YHVLV4QtFHF6I21JsZoOMPJQvTPRKwz9TmxBk1ZfTit-Fbb8LNYSJosx6JyZwVh9jiV0Lahzb8I3ktSie8/s640/blogger-image--934229285.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCW0J-JSmAnffVLdyWxl-xmj7hyphenhyphenTWUHwZricQxqguhQMw3X5xXmpOQVHPt_YHVLV4QtFHF6I21JsZoOMPJQvTPRKwz9TmxBk1ZfTit-Fbb8LNYSJosx6JyZwVh9jiV0Lahzb8I3ktSie8/s640/blogger-image--934229285.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>A quick stop in the office and a trip on a bus and a train</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_m987Wm21f22xclnCDTr0Q4pGlTAQl1xy0-V4fXpdlWwkCz66VIQxn6cuNaSKXXRBtmyRr0I_Al9CW2-rDY1rEVPZ85t4kbYlDT8Z-zBYv_JoaUs6hnyKOFHjsEE9k7OxV09RkJhBBXQ/s640/blogger-image-117592853.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_m987Wm21f22xclnCDTr0Q4pGlTAQl1xy0-V4fXpdlWwkCz66VIQxn6cuNaSKXXRBtmyRr0I_Al9CW2-rDY1rEVPZ85t4kbYlDT8Z-zBYv_JoaUs6hnyKOFHjsEE9k7OxV09RkJhBBXQ/s640/blogger-image-117592853.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUUU1dlrxs7gZq4RLOYMR33y7NVoCVeGaiXHXf3ec-9cYS31bmQu79QWkp5cOsGr0PXpsAomQBeR7qCTZUEikbyggBOaigox9VFuTmjAnQcRCMeRpcy1OiXPk9vmNUKZMzqIWKyJNgZCI/s640/blogger-image-605053783.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUUU1dlrxs7gZq4RLOYMR33y7NVoCVeGaiXHXf3ec-9cYS31bmQu79QWkp5cOsGr0PXpsAomQBeR7qCTZUEikbyggBOaigox9VFuTmjAnQcRCMeRpcy1OiXPk9vmNUKZMzqIWKyJNgZCI/s640/blogger-image-605053783.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>It finished with a damaged yoghurt in the shopping delivery which G loved </div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6jRmAFeTZSv_Iy__dMeBdA8a_TRKPeOZm9MWhAwodgCLBw6nqNFCeevo9nrz30ud5w1GovdfqErHyfyF85qdK0xyJYSzx7x1lbl9XButqvCHD-EU0CV0sNj8wMkdwvMU66C1lfet_YSo/s640/blogger-image-687844646.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6jRmAFeTZSv_Iy__dMeBdA8a_TRKPeOZm9MWhAwodgCLBw6nqNFCeevo9nrz30ud5w1GovdfqErHyfyF85qdK0xyJYSzx7x1lbl9XButqvCHD-EU0CV0sNj8wMkdwvMU66C1lfet_YSo/s640/blogger-image-687844646.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>But he's pooped in this heat. </div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjImB2qhNkk00B-boxHRMD8O1AiYuK-eMVG5yd43XNZmtN5KCzBAXqblwAZEI8Zea9h4x1AYs4dwvHpPy7MlL6bxRhgS_wtmyczUGyV_2-Svw9tyopjtxlTFVP5jq7xDzII38iyKpQNsw/s640/blogger-image-2004314054.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjImB2qhNkk00B-boxHRMD8O1AiYuK-eMVG5yd43XNZmtN5KCzBAXqblwAZEI8Zea9h4x1AYs4dwvHpPy7MlL6bxRhgS_wtmyczUGyV_2-Svw9tyopjtxlTFVP5jq7xDzII38iyKpQNsw/s640/blogger-image-2004314054.jpg"></a></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">And no pics as left phone in car but lovely walk in Swinley Forrest with Loo &Kerrie (& biscuit & Alana). </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">And relax. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-59350769760801403382013-05-04T22:16:00.001+01:002013-05-06T21:59:50.208+01:00PlaylistMy soppy, sleepy, thinking of you playlist <a href="http://open.spotify.com/user/millymolly1972/playlist/30aG9bFi9ngXBIXPo6hKJa">http://open.spotify.com/user/millymolly1972/playlist/30aG9bFi9ngXBIXPo6hKJa</a><br />
<br />Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-89312546397137698032013-04-21T22:53:00.000+01:002013-04-21T22:53:34.378+01:0030 Days of Curvy YogaWhen I started Yoga a few years ago I loved how practice made me feel, loved the peace and release and giving myself time to breath.<div>
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Life got in the way and I let it go, my mat went to storage and I just put myself back in the 'too fat' for yoga box.</div>
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I headed off to The Hill That Breathes for a week and whilst they were lovely and the week was amazing it just reinforced my view that I was wrong for yoga - not, you'll note, that yoga was wrong for me.</div>
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I've been looking for something recently, something in me and something for me. Im working, cooking, sewing, socialising living my life but I feel the need for some thing completely for me.</div>
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So I was introduced to <a href="http://www.curvyyoga.com/">Curvy Yoga</a> via Sas and her amazing ebook <a href="http://www.saspetherick.com/offerings/">The Body Stories</a> (if you haven't go over to her and download it, and spend time looking though her posts and love notes - trust me its worth it) and something in Anna's voice resonated with me. I mean the name alone 'Curvy Yoga' was made for me!</div>
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After signing up for Anna's emails and reading her notes I saw that she was running a 30 days of curvy yoga, on line course with <a href="http://marianne-elliott.com/">Marianne</a>. The timing just feels right for me - right place right time, time to be a bit kinder to my body and perhaps consider myself worth it?</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXZVyRo5U7MSLM1alTIyBxSgYs-h9WFKe5q9r1dgUT2N00jGUt6Iibec9jTRN5iMPGsiuE8vtNOD83aC1WrFgVPGy-NnMQKCC6yVmY7sMf-oqy5RDADpmsANyvSUqGSrkf9xnTXkBlbTg/s1600/30DaysCurvy1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXZVyRo5U7MSLM1alTIyBxSgYs-h9WFKe5q9r1dgUT2N00jGUt6Iibec9jTRN5iMPGsiuE8vtNOD83aC1WrFgVPGy-NnMQKCC6yVmY7sMf-oqy5RDADpmsANyvSUqGSrkf9xnTXkBlbTg/s1600/30DaysCurvy1.jpg" /></a></div>
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So I've headed in and started this week - this first week as been about getting ready - finding what it is that I need from my yoga practice, really considering my intention and being honest and serious about my commitment.</div>
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So the practice starts tomorrow, the kick off call was tonight. I'm looking forward to it - but also wondering why I chose the month when I am away so much to do it!!</div>
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Right then - I'll report back</div>
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Namaste</div>
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PCB x</div>
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Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-38470095064302655272013-04-12T12:45:00.001+01:002013-04-12T12:47:30.345+01:00A little rant....Ah the joys of working in HR.<br />
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Yep that means that I am the one who is usually there telling you that you're not performing, supporting the line manager. Having the conversation that the pay rise we have offered you is appropriate for the job and that if you want to work part time the salary will be part time and that you don't always get everything you want.<br />
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That you have BO.<br />
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That your time keeping sucks.<br />
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That we need to know when you will be here as we are covering for you when you are not and yes I understand your Child is ill - I'm not saying you have to be here just let us know, keep us informed.<br />
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That whilst yes we are a charity we are not a freaking charity - we are not an awful employer we have a good environment, pay sick leave, holiday, good maternity/paternity/adoption leave. Don't expect you to work to the bone. Wait you need to work from home - yeah no problem we'll make that work. Oh you need to come in late and take a shorter lunch and leave around the same time as everyone else. yep thats fine too - we trust you.<br />
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The problem is - we are a really small team and a small office and when you act like a self entitled fuck wit and I have to have a 'chat' with you it creates an atmosphere.<br />
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I am not a monster, but yes I can be the deliverer of bad, sad, difficult news. <br />
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But accuse me of annihilation - oh seriously you have seen nothing that was me on a good day, being productive and supportive and working with you to reach a solution. Want to see what I'm like if I don't have the professional shackles? Want to hear what I really think of the way you are acting?<br />
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Trust me you don't.<br />
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You get 24 hours to sulk but if you continue with this next week then guess what we'll be having another 'chat' where I ask you if there is a problem and what it is.<br />
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For now I will smile at you, include you, ask your opinion and engage with you. Act like a spoiled brat if you like - it really isn't going to help.<br />
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Seriously, I've been called a bitch, a formidable dragon, a sanctimonious cow; had the death march whistled when I've walked down a corridor; been blanked, shunned, ignored, left out; called the party police and been told that I am not nice.<br />
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Your behavior just re-enforces my view of you. I won't let this bother me when I get home tonight, I know we've been fair to you and actually tried to make things work for you.<br />
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Shame you can't be the same with me.<br />
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Rant over - phew.Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-85190730313205372902013-04-07T16:34:00.001+01:002013-04-07T16:34:55.861+01:00Black dogDarn you back dog back again. <br />
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Something's gotta give. Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-87363033964206220962013-04-07T12:21:00.001+01:002013-04-07T12:22:10.808+01:00Goose-ing aroundGoose has been in my life for over a year now - it's gone so quickly but I can't imagine being without him. So self indulgent puppyp*rn ahead...... <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqJEJSN_IH8FkquL1SfQjDisUf5Jok4uyNReJQYyP9xNxenNk0DmipCW_YA2Jj_HjO1-zrMn319WLQTCjHihgID2iDPxhlD8cRGWEOdJ6BmAMSWUeu-mLcyawKrm0yovJXDXU6Mv_nh-I/s640/blogger-image--2065887006.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqJEJSN_IH8FkquL1SfQjDisUf5Jok4uyNReJQYyP9xNxenNk0DmipCW_YA2Jj_HjO1-zrMn319WLQTCjHihgID2iDPxhlD8cRGWEOdJ6BmAMSWUeu-mLcyawKrm0yovJXDXU6Mv_nh-I/s640/blogger-image--2065887006.jpg" /></a></div> <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg97oEE3pbpJyf1spLCuNe6vUKFFMnv0za3A7Or38xWzgFr7U4EHN3hNi5uPzyW0J7jJa-ftqSjhVqZnix9bSI_0tm4a1Gw6oZZ8KCoiDZ2xyUa6Sri6-RjF4LWMALy0MCyIFq2EVmjMUI/s640/blogger-image-1068587767.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg97oEE3pbpJyf1spLCuNe6vUKFFMnv0za3A7Or38xWzgFr7U4EHN3hNi5uPzyW0J7jJa-ftqSjhVqZnix9bSI_0tm4a1Gw6oZZ8KCoiDZ2xyUa6Sri6-RjF4LWMALy0MCyIFq2EVmjMUI/s640/blogger-image-1068587767.jpg" /></a></div> <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQpLgFVvODFGZF8tFOClqOoJPe-QS2J5zVxKqtc-n-BXaqFb7uLUT1dh3jtXb9AaOQ45J35XL80VN92hd0PQWu4ZFBZjvKfJB-pD3roxWRyD98Dss_dqE6zJ_ptmbFRgx2g_jm7N_kano/s640/blogger-image--194211805.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQpLgFVvODFGZF8tFOClqOoJPe-QS2J5zVxKqtc-n-BXaqFb7uLUT1dh3jtXb9AaOQ45J35XL80VN92hd0PQWu4ZFBZjvKfJB-pD3roxWRyD98Dss_dqE6zJ_ptmbFRgx2g_jm7N_kano/s640/blogger-image--194211805.jpg" /></a></div> <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCfXMKlW3EuAUbdzFG7uytmBUu7xrFmB6Mh92ncpSRPS72zbfp3WIPaHQ0GP89LWEORp5O66EA5fEVuCpwW7SGfKZ-cbRD1boFOZaJaKrpFz7mla3NDTky3okZoPJe21pK4fW4VALegmU/s640/blogger-image-184184679.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCfXMKlW3EuAUbdzFG7uytmBUu7xrFmB6Mh92ncpSRPS72zbfp3WIPaHQ0GP89LWEORp5O66EA5fEVuCpwW7SGfKZ-cbRD1boFOZaJaKrpFz7mla3NDTky3okZoPJe21pK4fW4VALegmU/s640/blogger-image-184184679.jpg" /></a></div> <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjae7f8VOY30KZDWk_nU3VZk1xm4GEHhyphenhyphenOxq2s-aGYFegoVyqOsNsagKDimOEtvnrez9gI9BVMZ17xcefRmIAypJlrXZu4R2F5TIWFjMKy-UpMciJnKcJVgI9tALNxmR-Z53VA5ATx-OAw/s640/blogger-image--1851956084.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjae7f8VOY30KZDWk_nU3VZk1xm4GEHhyphenhyphenOxq2s-aGYFegoVyqOsNsagKDimOEtvnrez9gI9BVMZ17xcefRmIAypJlrXZu4R2F5TIWFjMKy-UpMciJnKcJVgI9tALNxmR-Z53VA5ATx-OAw/s640/blogger-image--1851956084.jpg" /></a></div> <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; 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but actual food not so much. However I know the importance of it and I do like it so I'm trying to train myself in to it, for, a habit.<br />
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I've discovered that if its colourful I seem it enjoy it more - so either quick or slow I need colour. Branflakes or plain porridge just aren't going to cut it. I was on leave last week so made the most - here's hoping it sticks.<br />
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And just because here's some recent breakfast pics - yep colours the way forward. <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT0_w796zNfrQyjPDmxlagUkmqNhVpqTQEe8QPTU9TM_6paPzi4snutjVlKpRgMS9DCsxTPwFuIqDz9QvamsqCmKhnakg_FcDK5M7P0FEsWnsUA9KW0Vaey5jT5bEqajneID9mczBd7A4/s640/blogger-image--89313014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjT0_w796zNfrQyjPDmxlagUkmqNhVpqTQEe8QPTU9TM_6paPzi4snutjVlKpRgMS9DCsxTPwFuIqDz9QvamsqCmKhnakg_FcDK5M7P0FEsWnsUA9KW0Vaey5jT5bEqajneID9mczBd7A4/s640/blogger-image--89313014.jpg" /></a></div> <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHBjyBACAe5hlkwdOFSXBO2oShhdYQLNL6vQ9vDA2g6wkkI-qg36oIuiTBJDYHQcUKy-EGSrN2_CjvcuoPlHFL92_bRP4kW7QdhCHhY5Hf1WgYNNR_vNJQ0ANlb4uMl0HMYfExHUJfFpw/s640/blogger-image--892599726.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; 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margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivWmBJzwqOxuC1txOYXLhQpbA-qrWJ9TL89fZEYDXFDXyopiDCI5n2mWN0Gea3pnZsQJHcEa-HzY0ClLgOv1DbuDwPNLi5RaLc8urAfQy73Gvav0iLRqO4ARZffKhuTAhIGamruw4o3jA/s640/blogger-image--1638944965.jpg" /></a></div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-46567867135265961512013-01-26T18:04:00.000+00:002013-01-26T18:04:18.539+00:00Snow DaysIts been brrrr cold, but being able to go out and walk Goose has been brilliant. He loves love loves the snow and loves long walks so the two combined make of a very happy Goose (and actually a pretty happy me). So off to Sundon Country Park we went, all wrapped up for a few hours of stomping in the snow.<br />
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I'm exhausted and had a lovely long soak in a hot tub and some soup when we got back. Pjs now on, wine in the fridge, lazy night ahead.<br />
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<br />Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-39928711444090618162013-01-01T08:03:00.001+00:002013-01-01T08:03:36.684+00:00Dear 2013New Years Day. I'm full of aches & hot & cold & yuck.<br />
<br />
It's been an, erm, interesting holiday season. Some kind words spoken and true friends realised and some vicious true feelings shown.<br />
<br />
In 2013 I'm going to Do More Of What Makes Me Happy - try not to worry too much about what others think and just tread the path of least destruction.<br />
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I don't want to hurt anyone, or be selfish, but do want to be kind to myself and allow it to be about me.<br />
<br />
So 2013 resolutions - not about giving anything up, or not doing anything but about doing more.<br />
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So more fun, more ink, more of what makes me happy.<br />
<br />
2012 ended well with the addition of a new tattoo - in 2013 I will be the wonder that keeps the stars apart.<br />
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Happy New Year xx<br />
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<br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm_E4TMwxNnU2dRzldUK_VVR4o6Yq8Gfu5LKqL090GuIwwE_D2x-FTROYUEaL73tuxYBMYpN-VahVqbJrsoHIuIvf1rBaqO_41eTSeWOP7expVI8Q-JhQLU9wcT2P-Mk8xh5EUFWOLKiI/s640/blogger-image--1828496899.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm_E4TMwxNnU2dRzldUK_VVR4o6Yq8Gfu5LKqL090GuIwwE_D2x-FTROYUEaL73tuxYBMYpN-VahVqbJrsoHIuIvf1rBaqO_41eTSeWOP7expVI8Q-JhQLU9wcT2P-Mk8xh5EUFWOLKiI/s640/blogger-image--1828496899.jpg" /></a></div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-23903202048499922742012-12-10T20:18:00.001+00:002012-12-10T20:18:52.060+00:00Merry Freaking ChristmasGoose isn't overly impressed with the Christmas festivities but the jumpers a hit, the Santa outfit not so much!<br />
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And we'll the elf one....oh dear. <br />
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But by the by, its now the week of my birthday (well in the 7 days leading up to the event) and its a perfect time to take a breath and be a little bit thankful.<br />
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So I am thankful for my family - my little home with Pepsi and Goose really does make me happy and I am thankful for the feeling of security and warmth and love I get there.<br />
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I am thankful for my true family - whilst I appreciate I will never be thin enough, polished enough or enough for my Ma I know that I am loved and I love and we have each other. <br />
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I am thankful for my friends, I miss you and wish we were closer but I am thankful for the long long friendships we have forged and the strength we give each other be that over motorways or seas and land.<br />
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I am thankful for my work - it drives me crazy and I get frustrated but I am at the start of something that is amazing and I am lucky to be here.<br />
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So I made pie - pumpkin pie - and I am thankful for the opportunity to share it.<br />
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Today is a good day.Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-91342648019573670932012-11-12T14:08:00.001+00:002012-11-12T14:08:57.642+00:00Countdown (16 days to go)Yep only 16 days until I turn 40.....gulp.<br />
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I thought it didn't bother me, that it was just a number. However my refusal to organise anything to celebrate and my avoidance of the facts probably should have given me a sign sooner that it does mean something....<br />
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So I have drinks organised post work - a little bit of a cop out; do it on a school night so that no one wants to stay out too late or get too lairy etc.<br />
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However, I tried on some clothes on Saturday and couldn't fit into anything so I am on a low carb diet for the next 2 weeks in an effort to at least fit into something for my birthday week that doesn't have an elasticated waist!<br />
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I am tracking my food intake over here on <a href="http://youatehowmuch.blogspot.co.uk/">You Ate How Much?</a> if you want to see my progress (hopefully). I'm hoping that writing it down will make it all very very real.<br />
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So I'm off to have a peppermint tea (oh joy).Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-7265250916631755182012-11-11T12:53:00.001+00:002012-11-11T12:53:18.407+00:00NFL London StyleA cold Sunday at the end of October we and 84,000 other NFL fans headed to Wembley to see the St Louis Rams play the New England Patriots. <br />
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So the Patriots were expected to win and impress they did - you can see why they made it to the Superbowl last year (even if they didn't win).<br />
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American Football can be slow and if you're not a fan can seem very stop start, what with the TV timeouts and all. <br />
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We had a great evening and I'm looking forward to he two games next year. <div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgURZQy1lVzWGI-HB8g-_74AIj5UbQt94OkDX9s-Urc32-NIp-dLpp8MCJi0bcpVCN-dDBGeGDJZA3v4vaaov1XroPG5nlkyp3w2Cfmg1hSxELiPfPGJSUGd0QywT2sf5mqpNq8x8ekswE/s640/blogger-image--844966157.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgURZQy1lVzWGI-HB8g-_74AIj5UbQt94OkDX9s-Urc32-NIp-dLpp8MCJi0bcpVCN-dDBGeGDJZA3v4vaaov1XroPG5nlkyp3w2Cfmg1hSxELiPfPGJSUGd0QywT2sf5mqpNq8x8ekswE/s640/blogger-image--844966157.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp-0b3SBOrIi69zL6_pgjy56QSekcwzTzn6e0BlwN5xlYMZt44a0lGkxciQqeDeJRjKnGZGmvTCP1I4Y2beNz_IYegRta4SjetDnQGhBbAg7rIc4JAQJXlF3HYJBQVYsYutTT62GPzTIo/s640/blogger-image-1263622778.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp-0b3SBOrIi69zL6_pgjy56QSekcwzTzn6e0BlwN5xlYMZt44a0lGkxciQqeDeJRjKnGZGmvTCP1I4Y2beNz_IYegRta4SjetDnQGhBbAg7rIc4JAQJXlF3HYJBQVYsYutTT62GPzTIo/s640/blogger-image-1263622778.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhOEIQREIYgooYEQY522ZGCVJZuLIcwJ7ETZ3n5h4TUeS9wFhw2XE7ao0YwHGY-0vn_YPhxU_rUX7rWh5eCuppQWrL-Cjoix752xd_qfg4kpU-Yer4Wx_rrjHUKkCwkcRRAomNhg-Y43E/s640/blogger-image--551309330.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhOEIQREIYgooYEQY522ZGCVJZuLIcwJ7ETZ3n5h4TUeS9wFhw2XE7ao0YwHGY-0vn_YPhxU_rUX7rWh5eCuppQWrL-Cjoix752xd_qfg4kpU-Yer4Wx_rrjHUKkCwkcRRAomNhg-Y43E/s640/blogger-image--551309330.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9ZmrHgt5ZHym0u5vW0V6ATZWn7l1QSMkQpsSnHWuXooV9f9-Vlm6voR1emNwmuH7WOSvjwTsmvpJPfqxhzSUu_bpWd9Qy0PURu-GYeA6GqzyNSTywbq6AxpyONYr82BweJ48rJm0mm-4/s640/blogger-image-1310758965.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9ZmrHgt5ZHym0u5vW0V6ATZWn7l1QSMkQpsSnHWuXooV9f9-Vlm6voR1emNwmuH7WOSvjwTsmvpJPfqxhzSUu_bpWd9Qy0PURu-GYeA6GqzyNSTywbq6AxpyONYr82BweJ48rJm0mm-4/s640/blogger-image-1310758965.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgfQgyGLXDkOPp6hznhxGbChMo1hFDLFuu5-rEtPqeUoJjAhw8O03SF-ElmMkkipEjnT75Q9vRDpKlBsQADvjuv2mt07zWp1Dkw0IrtJ-r3iPlGMXVZ0NbJO-L88hrTnhq3grClMA3OU4/s640/blogger-image--337810927.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgfQgyGLXDkOPp6hznhxGbChMo1hFDLFuu5-rEtPqeUoJjAhw8O03SF-ElmMkkipEjnT75Q9vRDpKlBsQADvjuv2mt07zWp1Dkw0IrtJ-r3iPlGMXVZ0NbJO-L88hrTnhq3grClMA3OU4/s640/blogger-image--337810927.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYcq45aSOyAuaTYtRH3GlnIOGJcivWPAGy_q3lnn3voYl0cHeqOKtQ9ju__6M1p9zLv51uLrYrQtZT_1CdRlbQn2lEaXx03k48Rnivf0_Yt2tBpjS33k6r0Gfk-hWisRs2qDw2g9r_w6w/s640/blogger-image--301830327.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYcq45aSOyAuaTYtRH3GlnIOGJcivWPAGy_q3lnn3voYl0cHeqOKtQ9ju__6M1p9zLv51uLrYrQtZT_1CdRlbQn2lEaXx03k48Rnivf0_Yt2tBpjS33k6r0Gfk-hWisRs2qDw2g9r_w6w/s640/blogger-image--301830327.jpg" /></a></div>Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-58640422353427537102012-11-01T18:15:00.001+00:002012-11-02T16:04:59.684+00:00Lipstick, powder and paintFabulous few hours at <a href="http://boutique.thepowderpuffgirls.com/services.html">The Powder Room</a>, Columbia Road. <br />
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I'm ready for my night out now. <br />
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Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5354468814904926625.post-69895675480689722642012-10-29T20:51:00.001+00:002012-10-29T20:51:00.595+00:00Not so baby stepsBig day today....BIG DAY. <br />
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We've been separated two year so it was time to talk the big D. <br />
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I mentioned, he agreed, I said I'd send the papers, he said fine. <br />
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It's happening, in the next few months I'll be divorced. <br />
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So married before I was 30 and divorce started before I'm 40. <br />
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Hey I really do those milestones right?<br />
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So it's moving forward, moving on, just moving. <br />
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I feel sad and happy and sad and well sad I guess. <br />
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Phew big day, big steps. Pontecarlobluehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02792787977601437388noreply@blogger.com1